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2021-11-06 21:19:00 (UTC)

Just that.

It would be so easy to do what I'm thinking of. I suppose, to fall into that or do it at all, the essence of it really, is to simply jump into things, or rather walk into them calmly, without hesitance, without waiting, without procrastinating.
And I suppose it would make sense that I am just a body. Nothing more than that, no extra mind bull, no mind separation from body. Not a personality, not necessarily. No inner gender, sexuality, or romantic orientation. No split personality or imaginative world within. Just a body, with reactions, and brain chemicals that may affect my physio-/emotional state of being. Nothing more, nothing less. No reason to blow things out of proportion or assume that I was born anymore special than the rest. Just human, a body, mapped out genetically along with the rest of the world. And all that makes up my life will be time alone, presenting myself to others, spent with family and non-friends. The actions I make that have consequences that would only be perceived as good or bad by me because of my difficulty socializing with people and problems fixing myself. Reactions which lead to actions or rather emotional outbursts that are actions. Not very subtle, unfortunately. Life, as it is, or what I believe it will be, is quite plain. But I think that's better than it being complicated. It's plain and often boring and quiet, tending to push tedious tasks onto us for prolonged periods of time.
But I am just a body. Just living a life until it ends. Living in a civilization. On a single continent. On a single planet. In a single solar system. In a single universe. I simply am.


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