TM49

My History Of Familial Incest
2021-10-07 16:36:31 (UTC)

Wants And Needs

I often wonder why we are born into this place with the beast of need within us. First we need the basics of survival, then when those are covered we need peoples love and time and safety and security. Always wanting and needing. The two are different but intermingle and at the end of the day create a muddied area where we don't know which is which. It all folds together you see. We are like starving baby birds cawing to be fed, then fed some more. There is no answer to this either. There are those who go out in the world and forgo many earthly desires and companionship, but even they have basic needs in order to survive. We don't have to be demanding but NONE of us can entirely be unselfish. This instinct of need drives us towards others to be fulfilled. We seek others because of that innate desire. It's not wrong, but it can go wrong and it goes wrong a lot.
I wish I didn't need love and intimacy. I wish I didn't need to ease this loneliness I feel. I wish I didn't want more people in my life. But I want all these things AND I need them. Those who say they are just fine on their own are a true rarity, and often they are choosing that solitude because once their need was filled and then taken from them. They often need others the most. We can become "used" to being alone but at least for me the yearnings for someone (romantic and non) in my life are strong.
Wants and needs are bastards...and it very well might be what makes us human too.
-TM



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