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2021-10-05 17:29:57 (UTC)

I'm eating ..

I'm eating again.
I know that if I cycle between starving and binging then that's gonna fuck up my metabolism. So I kinda just have to... manoeuvre around the part of myself that wants to not eat.

I started eating properly again because I went to have sunday lunch with family, and 1) free food is "allowed" in my logic, and more vitally 2) I didn't want anyone to be worried about me.

I'm not as hypomanic as I was. But I enjoyed it. And I want it to keep going. But maybe I should just be thankful that, as extreme as it was this time (I'd never seriously I considered that I might be bipolar before) that I'm more balanced now, and didn't have a big depression crash.

Thankful I've never had a full-blown ED as well, and my restrictive/starving phases have never been longer than a week each.

Thankful that I LIKE food and that my sensory issues around it aren't that bad