If I die today
Today is pretty typical did a short run with the dog. He is A_okay from his cold/allergy or whatever so tommrow push harder maybe. my knees are a little sore still calfs also feeling overworked. Got housechores done. Lunch was short nDea has to make a trip for work 2 hours each way so cut lunch short but still exspecting him home late. The nieghbor came over this morning/afternoon 10 or 11ish after i walked the dog and she claims she had her door wide open when she got home this morning like someone must have broke in. This is not impossible but I didnt see anything I asked nDea and he didnt notice anything either so who knows.
In other news I'm really thinking that I need to just push thru suck it up and pay the attorney. They still have made no responce to my call about the bill it seems redicoulus. I think thou the divorce and my life liveing purely should be priorty and maybe this is the cost. I'm considering walking down there tommow and surrendering the 117. IDK thou I feel like that could be a mistake it sad due on the 23rd but I'm afraid if they dont call I'll get a late fee also and so on I'm not sure and honestly at this rate I dont know if I can afford this for the next however many months but I know I want it and I think I need it and just am soo unsure what the provision is. For today not running down there. Also I wonder if going and paying it shows them that I'm an easy target to just be nickeled and dimed. I really need to decide what I'm wanting and what to do. but I feel like in this world its soo important to do this now. As more and more I feel it I see it coming the walls are closing my life is over. Its getting more and more diffuclt to do things bc well Im not obedeint. I have a few things to do but its getting more and more. Its ashame and sad but I must accept it bc who knows when the door will slam shut on legal services and court hearings for me. Oh I just remembered i didnt cancel/rescheulde/delay my pyschail I really need to call them its in october so coming soon. This morning nDea won the news contest it was for some tatoo convention thou lol which isnt either of our interst but he's going to try to give the tickets away we would have went thou since he won but he knows I would self suffercate and he wont take anyone else. so theres that. well thats the latest on today
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