CryingSoul

Lost for words at times
2021-09-19 08:29:21 (UTC)

Beautiful sunny but cold morning

Mood - happy

Good morning, l had an amazing nights sleep. I started watching something on netflix but fell asleep. (Rolls eyes) maybe it's because l watch netflix on my fone. Still haven't watched actual television in over a year now, reason being l got sick to death of hearing about the pandemic. I believe media use distraction, they want us to know what they want, to cover up what's actually going on. And l can't honestly stand soap operas.. l have enough drama going on in my life without watching that. I did munch my way though loads of stuff l knowing know l shouldn't of been munching, but hey l can get my fluffy backside out today to compensate for that.
I feel in a good place this morning. I think it's because i'm now putting my relationship with him into perspective. My partner is an alcoholic can l help him ? No, unless he only wants to help himself. Is he abusive emotionally, physically? Yes that has just recently started. Do l feel respected ? Not really, Have boundries been crossed ? Yes
What am l going to do... distance myself from the situation. It's not my fault his wife passed away. I'm not a substitute or comfter. Although l will be here when times get tough for him as he didn't want her to pass away either. He is more than welcome to talk about her. I'm not responsible for the dysfunctional way he allows his kids to behave, ie supporting there drug habbits even paying for it as it has no detriment to me. I support him for doing his bands but l believe he is taking on too much by setting up a new one. Maybe he should be concentrating more on bringing his kids (ages 16 & 18) up in a healthy balanced, loving manor, instead of giving them the rights of entitlement. And who is supporting them through the loss of there mother. Absolutely tragic!

He will always be my childhood friend and l will always love him but for the time being i'm removing myself.

It's a beautiful, coldish morning. Time me thinks to go get showered and get out there and do something good.

My song today - Autumn Changes
by Zakk Wylde

As I stand upon these shores of lies and deceit
The tides that turn against you
And the storms that one cannot see
Just like a storm that keeps on rolling
Forever rolling on
My autumn changes have come and gone
Like the falling leaves and the memory of what you've become

The cold wind blows upon your senseless fall from grace
Behind the mask of greed, I could not see your face
Just like a storm that keeps on rolling
Forever rolling on
My autumn changes have come and a gone
Like the falling leaves and the memory of what you've become
My autumn changes have come and gone
Gone, gone, gone, gone, gone

Take care of you x


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