Becoming quietly confident
2021-09-01 22:47:32 (UTC)

This week, more frisky-ness, my ex, and art (18+)

Monday night
my husband fondled me again as we were watching a tv series. I told him it’s not right that he turns me on and then doesn’t do anything about it. Tuesday night he started to do the same thing. At one point I stopped him and said your wife needs to cum. He responded by going down between my legs.

I have found that writing about our sex life is helping me. It’s helping me to put words to emotion. It’s changing me in ways that then changes how I react to my husband and how he reacts to me. If you follow this diary you have heard me complain a whole lot about the lack of sex. Up until recently we had gone a year without, this was not my doing, and before that we had gone a year.

I was finding myself withdrawn emotionally from my husband and I have no idea why. Here he is coming around, spending time with me, talking with me, engaging sexually with me and trying to draw me closer and now I am finding myself a little hesitant. I’m not sure why.

My ex friended me on Facebook and because I am an idiot I accepted. Before accepting the invitation I told myself that maybe this way we could actually be friends, maybe passively. These are lies I’m telling myself and I know it. He has not messaged me and I will be quite hesitant to engage in conversation with him again if he does. A while ago he tried to friend me on snap chat, there is no freeking way I am adding him back on that.

Art class
And I realized I put the word art in the last diary entry title and then completely forgot to write about it. I’ve been asked to teach a small art class in a local studio. There was another teacher that was to teach this class but she’s moving so I’m going to be taking it over next week. I have a background in art so I’m kind of excited for this small fun side job.