Esmeralda_Bramble

Like a Moth to a Flame
2021-08-29 22:57:14 (UTC)

Bender’s eyes

Saw a goat up close, in person for the first time yesterday. I was so mesmerized by its eyes! The iris, I think that’s what it’s called, is rectangular! 😮 it reminded me of Bender from Futurama! Made me think the goat was a robot since robots in that show had square irises. Fascinating!

My depression is really bad today. Add to it ho out of shape I am. Now, I get winded when I speak. I can’t feel my bones in my body. I feel my heart giving up. Destructive thoughts persist. I’m exhausted. I’m losing hope, I feel I’m going to get sick. Sometimes I just don’t know what to do anymore, I’m just eating it away and go through the motions. My head hurts, I can’t breathe. I’m fucking crying and I don’t know why! I’m a zombie 🧟‍♀️ Why can’t I be a strong person and not be affected? Why can’t I just be positive and think that others have more difficult lives than me but are still going on. Why am I such a whiner? I don’t know, I want this to stop. I want to stop. Please. I’m sorry. I’ll stop now.




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