blkdragon

grounded
2021-08-21 17:16:19 (UTC)

The trip that didn't make it, make it, make it!

Skating as much as I can and it's costing me a pretty penny, the flip side would be identified by a body count. There will be times when you're in a hurry and you find yourself forgetting something very important, it also happens with things that aren't important at all; to you. I left the door unlocked, multi-tasking and pressed for time, became an issue with Roomie; because you forget nothing? I find myself cleaning the stove and the bathroom sink, when I've used neither.
I just explained that life is a gift, we arrive to this world (most of us) in perfect order, our every system is on point; those blessed with us are as tested as we are.
I needed a shower, he wants to keep harping on little things, like double locking the front door; making sure it's locked. If I'm in the apartment, I don't feel a need to lock any doors, I have no enemies to speak of, I would know them when I saw them (they are the ones that even though they don't know you, they hate you) and I don't fear people. I would be uncomfortable with the wolf (I didn't notice) if I'm in the woods alone, the car I didn't see as I crossed the street, the grinning maniac approaching me with the bloodied ax handle
I try to keep my focus on what I can do for others, let me tell you how difficult that is, when you often want to stomp the taste out of everyone that looks at you funny; when you don't even know them.
I have a lot of skaters telling me to stay, to skate in the largest arena in the world for 40 years, if I cared more for myself than I care for my loved ones; I'd ask for a stay of execution. Did I just make it seem that acquiescence is akin to death, it isn't, I can't have my Family worried about my wavering attention; which I (by the way) don't believe I have. Not one soul of this world concerns themselves with things they don't truly care about! Of course, this says nothing about failing memories, being overwhelmed by the sheer enormity of information and how much of it you must commit to; too easy to say "the hell with that"!
So I get my things together, to head out, running a bit behind; Roomie suggests taking a portion off my monetary responsibility and I decline. I go to use the stove, after he's used it, gotta clean it to keep from adding to the cooked on spillage. My Nephew called me to tell me about the house he just bought, he's adamant about me purchasing property here, he doesn't want to never see or hear from me again; I love him to but my responsibility is to my blood. Skip came to the rink tonight, I think he's missing me as much as I miss him, 40 years; he's seen me do things. Someone once accused me of touching a child, if memory serves me, I invited that person outside so I could touch him; Skip got involved and asked me not to go outside. I responded, "Skip, he accused me of being a pedophile, I'm going outside."
He imagined I'd get hurt, I wasn't planning on it, he sent security to escort the person out of the building and asked me to put my skates back on; yes, I love this man! When I first entered tonight, I looked for Skip, I was overwhelmed to see him because I didn't expect to. I could see the cancerous growth on him, I hadn't before, he wants to make sure we see each other before I leave and I wouldn't think of leaving him without saying goodbye! I don't think Charles is pleased with how much his Father and I care for one another, the man should and needs to stay at home, he comes to see me before we both leave; I understand Charles' concern. I also understand my relationship with Skip and his relationship to his second home, which is also my second home, I thanked him and went to skate. I will pray for him tonight, ask to relieve his discomfort and bless him with peace for all the people he's blessed with joy.




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