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2021-07-14 22:51:38 (UTC)


I finished yesterday’s entry with the intent of making it public, but delving into personal venting made that impossible because I ended up writing almost extensively about DG, and I can’t post it out of respect. It’s a bit of a dilemma still. I don’t want to write about myself only because I’m really not self-absorbed, but I also can’t write so much about others because I don’t gossip/slander. I write about others when they heavily affect my emotions of state of mind or just to give them credit for being in my life, but I also can’t write too much in order to maintain their privacy.

Most of today was spent inside my head. I developed stories, delved into ideas, and for the first time in a long while, I took a mental journey through my misty suburbs and into the first leaf of my labyrinth. Everything seemed so clear, felt clear, smelled, sounded… until I fell asleep and dreamt. The last thing I remember is L taking me home, to our room, and then everything fades.

Tell you what though; it’s not so bad to be a creative at time. I’m well aware that my escape is mine alone, and there’s something pure about not sharing too much of it. Because of my artistic skills, it occurred to me to actually draw and paint this inner world of mine, just to bring it closer to something real. I wondered if that would work as a picture book project before deciding this one was all for me. There will be other worlds, and other illustrations to come with them.

There isn’t a proper heading this time. Really, I just wanted to put something out there. Goodnight.

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