By Myself

Somewhere I Belong
2021-07-05 19:03:58 (UTC)

You had one job...

your own inhibitions and your anxiety shouldn't come in the way of work. It's like telling an introvert (me) to handle clients and talk to them. We aiint built for this shit. There are people who love to talk to people. we are not them. We just get drained talking so much.

but then thats what happened to me. one lady quit so i got promoted and bang the next day i had to handle the horde of human stupidity. i was thrown into the deep end of the pool and told to survive, felt like sharks were circling me all the time.

the amount of goof ups i made in those times were epic. If it was anyone else they would be fired. But the powers to be had confidence in me. when even i didn't. I don't know if they just wanted me to do the fucking job or actually they believed in me. either way i survived the shark infested water until they seem like harmless turtles to me. no book. no motivational words can help you once you are thrown into the pit of self doubt and anxiety. only way is to move forward and try not to be a complete ass. accept your limits. and work around them. that shit helped me. what helped me was my own determination and my back against the wall kind of situation. complaining had no use since the boss said yes people are like this can't help it. indians bargain like crazy. when it happens to much, i hand it over to my boss. I see them walk in with bling and some good threads but for fuck sakes they refuse to pay the extra they need to.

those times helped me to multi task, to now hold my own in a conversation and im still working on managing the "karens" of society. as much as i can i just transfer them all to my head. let him handle it. i do as much as i so i had to sort of turn off my own anxiety when im at work. if it were my own personal life i would run and hide and tell them to fuck off. but business is business. gotta keep your own shit far from it.


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