legacy

If I die today
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2021-06-28 14:35:28 (UTC)

over eating

Right now I'm struggling with heartburn. I'm a little tired too. I think I overate for lunch I had thee end of the stirfry but I ate it all. I tend to eat a bit much and a lot of my problems are probally portions control I dig into the chip (corn strips) early today too. Been up since about 5am as usual had a few wakings in the night I started to head to bed at 630 last night. Maybe the heat is making me tired IDK . I was a lottle upset yesterday too bc nDea called the C monster IDK why or what triggered it. I only heard him say how are you havnt talked to you in a while then I got the impression of course she was invigitng to do something he said oh its alittle hot righ now for all that then I heard him tell her working 40hrs a week 5days a week its hard to find time. Anyhow thats neither here nor there I'm dyin on food. I just made the grocery list I suck. Its really hard for me to think outside of my usual I really dont want hotdogs but well I know that things like that when it comes to convience here for the 2 of us thats an option. nothe speficlly that I hate them or dont eat them its just not what I would put on the list if it was jsut me this week. but IDK how to put everything together. I dont even know where we are going to shop. anyhow I have some bitters and tensions grinding not anything over pwoering I also have some delights its give and take but I'm a worrier and what to do IDK what do we do about the 4th got an invite to my friedns as most years but nDea's niece usually does something and IDK I dont wanna be involved with C and thats his daughters mother and his whatever so what to do. I might just back out on both and push him to go to his thing. WE got invited to my friends me and my boyfriend so itd be award to show up without him and Id feel back asking him to pass on his family. Basicaly we dont see much of anyoneelse just us and its good for him to see other peope that are not C. With my dietery restrictions to it doesnt matter what we do its still gonna be weird for anyone. I dont wanna fight and its not reasonable to exspect the host to exclude C. Anyhow tired and overeating is my deal. Just screwin up my life. Walked for like 25min this morning bc heat. I havnt yet excerised IDK when I'm going to bc I want to use my video outside I dont have time now s nDea is exspected at 4 so I cant throu one on tv but maybe after the store. Right now it says 106 outside. Its probally hotter in the sun. A lot on my mind. I called mSpectru to see about my bill and I was charged for tv and the prices on everything were soo high I got it adjusted but IDK if they changed this current amount due all this [email protected] online IDK what it means but it sure does lok to me like thy still want dam near 150 I might hvae to call them back again tommorw. UGh things to look forard to. Anyhow Its thoughtful that I am invited this year to the 4th. I'm glad I have food today. I have shelter. Clothes. ( I got most the landry done today). SO theres some good. I havtn read at all today as far the the bible. I guess I can work on that who knows when I'm so addicted to nDEa


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