Small Body 🤍🖤
Girl Anatomy 🖤🤍
Blonde boy 🍌
~ I wrote this months ago while I was with my ex boyfriend (bf at the time) and was having guilty thoughts about my friend TB. Ive still remained platonic with TB even after I broke up with my bf DA. I deleted this story a bit out of embarrassment and guilt but it feels more normal now knowing that the sexual fantasies I had towards TB weren't enough to sway me from our platonic friendship. I guess there were problems in my relationship that made me appreciate things in my friend TB that turned into sexual frustration.
• I wish I was high to write about this but, I think I got too dependent on feeling a buzz. I got too dependent on substance, porn, and bad habits. I feel like the control over what I do to myself makes me feel stronger cuz while trying to write this my family is fighting and while hearing them I feel like a normal sad person. But with my ear buds in I feel like an eccentric sad person instead. Maybe I romantize and put myself in bad situations to feel stronger cuz it feels better than having someone else hurt u in a truly helpless situation.
• My Blonde Friend TB is my second diary. He knows more about my trauma to the grit than my boyfriend becuase im bad at feeling vulnerable in romantic situations. But I want to be vulnerable to my friend since my heart isn't in it so I'm not scared of the idea of him 'violating' me. My sex life with my BF is great so I note that is not an issue. But I know that TB is in control and my curiosity lies in that maybe.
<3 ( I'm still timid to write unfiltered 100%). In my sexual fantasy high sex is still the best. I see us in his room alone even tho I've been there many times in person without temptation. In the scenario he's always a rebound after a breakup with my bf DA. I initiate becuase I know he finds me very pretty but he's too respectful to make a move. I make the room dark out of nowhere and lick his bottom lip. He's smaller than me since he's 5'2 and I'm 5'7 so I wonder if I have to slouch to kiss him. I kiss him with a tight pout and gently hold his face while my fingers pet his cheek. I wanna touch his blonde hair cuz I'm into blonde guys. I'd stroke it from the back of his head and pinch the locks of his hair. It's just blonde but that's mesmerizing to me when it comes to him. Forget his pretty eyes and tattoos becuase he's blonde.✨ Knowing he's a Dom he'd probably take it from here but, in my fantasy he's still processing. I can keep him entertained for at least 15 if I straddle him in his gamer chair while making out with him ~ biting his lips and sucking on his tongue while he feels my tongue piercing. His dick is I think 5-6 Inches hard and I prefer it that way. 🥕>🍆 He'd probably have a tight grasp on my waist and he'll play with whatever interesting cheeky goth outfit I wore that day ~Tiny dress, fishnets, fluffy skirt,ect. ((I'm not normally his type since he likes the innocent type but, I know I happen to be an exception. I know this becuase, of the conversation we had when I had to take a break from my boyfriend for unrelated reasons. I thought this guy would be my rebound and I still can't shake the sexual attraction. Anyways )). I'd want to touch his arms cuz of the tons of tattoos but it's not like I can feel them anyways. I'd make him feel like we're bonding with the soft touch of my hand while I go hard on him with my hips. I touch him down there to finally know his texture, size, shape, scent, and also what foreskin feels like. I know I'll be hesitant to suck on a shaft with foreskin but I know I'm good at it so I lick and lick. I put him whole in my mouth with drool and towards the end I suck in my lips around his cock for a good oral grip. I'd hope he'd be impressed since bjs are my strong point. On his ridiculously big bed he'd lay down on his back pant less and I teach him what a thigh fuck is. I lay down on top of him with my head buried in his shoulder. I take his heavily lotioned cock and put it between my legs and close them. 🧴I do the thrusting which rubs his cock against my vagina which is like a hot dog going in and out of a bun, really. I can squeeze really tight and tbh its better than hand jobs. ((It does the most for me but I've never had an orgasm before and I don't think I've ever gotten close to. Some girls are just like that so I'm fine with that.)). I'm more interested now in what he can show/teach me though. He'd put me in missionary and slide in raw. He'd thrust strong enough that it he rams himself into me while holding onto my hips. I don't know if he's a moaner but I'd moan for him. He breathes heavier and heavier cuz he has asthma but it wouldn't stop him. Hell collapse into me once he's getting closer. Id hope hed ball my hair into his fist as he cums inside me.
And hopefully we would do more than just that all night but this is essentially what Id imagine our first to be like if there ever was one. I don't think I have a crush on him and I wouldn't dump my bf for a fling but I'm so young so maybe I know this relationship is unlikely to last. And if it doesn't last then I'll close to sleeping with Blonde Boy. I can feel the perversion in this and I don't know if everyone else has these thoughts when they're in a happy relationship but, I just need to let it out somewhere.