Echo

C'est La Vie
2021-06-10 00:56:48 (UTC)

Lame excuses

I have a lot of time to think, and I've been down all week. One thing I've been thinking about is if I get better. There are friends of mine who dipped out of my life as soon as I got sick. Katelyn being one of them, which hurt me.

I loved Katelyn like a sister, we did everything together. We would go on late night drives together, go on adventures. We worked together, we had planned to be roommates in college. I was supposed to be a bridesmaid in her wedding next year.

I saved her so many times, like when she moved out on her own and she was struggling with depression and drinking, I made the two hour drive back up here from my college and helped her. She got so drunk one morning I thought she was going to kill herself and I rushed over to her house to help her, I got her dressed, dumped out all of her alcohol, and drove her to her Mom's house. Only to be called an enabler by her family. I tried to warn her about moving her boyfriend in with her after only knowing him for 2 weeks, and the fact he was addicted to drugs. I tried to warn her about her other friends who did meth. But she still got set on the path of trying to save them, and in the process started doing acid herself.

Then I just listened to her when she had issues with them, and tried to be as supportive as I could.

She never respected my boundaries when I said I didn't wanna smoke or do acid, or to please not smoke around me when I was starting to get sick. She smuggled alcohol into my dorm when I to her not to. She screamed at me in my driveway because I said I couldn't go to a concert with her, and she blocked me. 6 months ago when I was in the middle of being bedridden she really sat there and said "Your illness is all you ever talk about" like I was supposed to be talking about something else or spin it positive. Then started to talk about me driving up to see her, when I hadn't been able to drive my car in months. She didn't even wish me a happy birthday, and there's no excuse of "her not knowing" she's known me for 6 years. While I was in the hospital she couldn't be bothered to ask if I was okay.

So I'll be damned if her, or anyone else tries to sweet talk their way back into my life after all of this. Either you're there when it counts, or you're not close to me like you claim. Saying "they don't know how to handle it" is just a lame excuse.




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