A stranger

ThoughtsAfterMidnight
2021-05-23 22:51:25 (UTC)

Jealousy

Hello, as you can guess it is me again. I just read over my last entry and damn I sound dramatic as fuck. But here we go again, you know me, a depressed messy stressy dramatic bitch.

Enough self-loathing. HA. got you, there shall be much more of that, especially as this lovely entry is about jealousy.

So, what triggered this you may be wondering. well this is an emotion I feel almost every day or even every day, I am not sure I don't really remember anything. my friend was just talking about their problems and obviously, I with my damn individuality complex was hurt that I wasn't alone in a specific feeling which I will probably get more into in another late night impulse entry. it is stupid, I am aware, but everything they do and experience triggers this deep and complex feeling of intense jealousy that takes over me and makes me into this miserable ass. just them talking to our mutual friend, who likes them a lot because they are their favourite person, makes me livid. I am so possessive and obviously, it is because I care about them and I hope I never act out on these feelings or express them to the extent I experience them too. why cant I just be happy for them, why do I want to ruin everything. it makes me feel like such a bad person.




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