So u already know that Chloe, the girl I walk to scl with and one of the girls in my friendship group, is also crushing on Tyrese. But how will she cope if she finds out that I am crushing on him too, and for even longer than her!
Me and Chloe go way back to Y4 cos we went to choir together and now we ended up walking to scl with each other. Our relationship has always been different to that of the others in our group; we have never fought, we keep each other’s secrets very safe, and we listen to each other’s VERY DIFFERENT views on things.
Chloe has been allowed to date since like Y3 which my parents would never allow. Tbh I also think that dating when u r younger than 9 is never a really good idea as u r too young to even understand the concept of a proper relationship. However, I DO think that dating from Y8 or 9 is alright as u r more emotionally mature and can be ready for a relationship. I mean, if I was in a relationship then I wouldn’t go around sleeping with every boyfriend I have ever had. I am Christian so I am more for the idea of sex after marriage. U know what I mean? I think I might be a bit uncomfortable knowing that my husband had slept with someone else before and has experience, also it would be weird knowing that my husband went ‘inside’ another woman if u know what I mean. And listen, if u wanna be like that, I’m not gonna go against u, but still, I think it isn’t right and I would never do it myself.
C what I mean by the fact that I am very honest and direct with my opinions. Everyone in my friendship group says that I am the most direct person they know lol!
Chloe, however, has even being saying that she’s gonna lose her virginity when she is 16 or 17 and she LIKES the idea of being a teen mum. I think that it’s SISTERS BEFORE MISTERS and STUDIES BEFORE ‘BUDDIES’.
C what what I mean?
Chloe has gone out with quite a few boys (around 7 or 8) and her longest relationship was around 2 months long. I think that if a guy asks u out, u shouldn’t agree cos u feel sorry for the guy, or for popularity, or cos u think u would be a great couple, I think that u should date cos u really, actually like the guy. Chloe looks for personality, like me, but she doesn’t care if she likes them properly or not, she just cares that they have a great personality.
The other day, when we were walking home with Erica, she was saying how she wants a boyfriend so badly and how she there were a few ppl that ppl ship her with. She said three ppl:
Bailey Blackburn: ‘he’s fit but has a dead personality’
Harvey: ‘but we hate each other’
Tyrese: ‘he’s really sweet’
At that point I was hoping Erica would jump in like ‘yeh but I don’t shop u two together’ like she does with other guys for Chloe. But this time, she was like ‘oh yeh! I like the two of u together’. I was just thinking ‘someone help me’ cos I can’t really be like ‘I have a crush on Tre too u know’ cos I got the chance to tell Chloe before she told me but I was too late.
One time, she asked me to play kiss, marry, kill with Tyrese and his best mate Luke to see if he would date her. So obviously I was like ‘ok. But I can’t guarantee anything too soon’ and I did try to do it for her, but I never really got the chance and I guess I wanted to protect myself form heartbreak if he ended up saying he would kiss or marry Chloe.
Yesterday, I was walking to scl with Chloe and she was telling me about her video call with Renee (cos of all the Beef) and she told me that she got a message from Tyrese asking her what had happened in our friendship group. I was like “wait, do u have his number?” and I was planning on how to ask to have it too so I could ‘complete my contact book’. But she said that she didn’t have his number, it was just his Snap that she had. I was relieved as I was actually getting worried they were texting. To not seem desperate or let her find out I like him I said “Oh, I was gonna be like LUCKY CHLOE for having his number!” So gladly I saved myself from letting out my secret. I have realised that this is not JUST A CRUSH, it has become more, now I am overprotective of which girls he chats to, which girls r crushing on him, who he mentions to his mates at any time...I’m becoming JEALOUS. I have never been like this before and I’m not sure if it’s a good thing.
Chloe has liked Tre for about three weeks but I’ve liked him for a month and a half roughly. I know Chloe is more forward and flirty than me so I.. I don’t know who stands a better chance - me who talks to him everyday for like at least two hours daily - or her who talks to him twice a week at most for about two hours a week.
I wish love lives were more simple, more kind - I wish one girl was assigned and destined to love one guy and that guy would like her back with no competition. I wish there was no way of falling out with a friend cos of a guy. I mean, it sounds stupid...doesn’t it? I don’t know if it is worth telling Chloe how I feel about Tre, I don’t know if she would be understanding as we always r with each other, I don’t know if it would mean having to fight harder for a guy maybe even neither one of us have a chance with.
About a week ago I was gonna tell her, but Ella said that if I wanna stay friends with her then I shouldn’t. But as I said before, our friendship is different to others in our group.
U probably know what the girls code is but imma tell u either way:
- Never date a guy who ur friend is crushing on
- Don’t date another’s ex
- Don’t choose a guy over ur friend
- Don’t backstab or be two faced
- Give honest advice
- Support each other
- Be HONEST with each other
- Don’t tell each other’s secrets
- Watch out for each other
- Don’t leave anyone behind
I haven’t said that I DON’T like him and I haven’t said that I do. So technically I’m still being honest. Also, I don’t have to tell her all my secrets cos she’s not my BEST friend. I don’t want to break the girls code, but I feel like if I tell her it would be breaking it too, but if I don’t she could break it without even knowing!