Being Sam
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2021-05-19 16:50:49 (UTC)

Is it OK?

Can I go on holiday with a man, just the two of us, if that man isn't my husband?

Dean has met Chris and he actually thought he was gay (which is funny because the man is a ridiculous flirt with women) and he agrees that he's the male version of me, so see's why we've become good friends at work. I went to his house yesterday to take him some yumnuts for his birthday and Dean never made it an issue either - because it's not, he's my friend and also his girlfriend is due to have twins in July this year so it's not a weird shady thing...she was at the house too (Side note- her belly was so teeny considering there's 2 humans in there! Blew my mind).
So yeah...we've established we're friends and it's cool and there's no issue with me being at his house without Dean. I'm cool, Dean is cool, Chris is cool and so is his girlfriend Jess.
For months we've (me and Chris) spent atleast half of our time at work saying we're gonna go to one of those island huts and just sunbathe and talk shit and tell each other our teenage stories because they're so similar! And honestly, I always thought it was abit of a joke. But at his house yesterday Jess was like are you gonna book somewhere for a few nights and get him out of my house for abit? And I thought Came home and told Dean about it and he laughed too and said go for it.
BUT if Dean had a really good girl friend who wanted them to go on a long weekend to get pissed (aka super drunk for the non English), I don't think it matters how much I trust him (implicitly) or how platonic their relationship was, I would NOT be cool with that.
So going would make me a massive hypocrite, right?

I'll ask my question again, is it OK for me to go on holiday with a male friend? Like is that frowned upon as a married woman? Because I don't fancy Chris and as much as I get on with him, it's in that friend way where you've found a person who gets you but who the thought of naked makes you feel all awkward and a little bit "ew" but at the same time, will it look bad? Will it make Dean look bad too? Like I'd embarrassed him by going away with somebody else? I don't think any of them are making this quite the big deal I am, but I know what people are like and I don't want something innocent to suddenly cause an issue.
Or am I doing just that and making it a problem by analysing it? He's my friend, we wanna go talk shit on the beach...

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