👁️ Bandersnatch 👁️

Through the Looking-Glass
2021-04-24 20:40:15 (UTC)

Pretty Little Bluebells vs Dickheads

My giving a fuck until I realise their tactics
Then not giving a fuck when they're trying to fuck me
And fucking them right back.
It has proven to be quite effective, lol.
Also, the added benefit of numerous admirers tends to stick like flies to shit, because I don't care if they do or they don't.

Yeah, that's been me since mid-2019. However, I am not man-hating; it applies to everybody, male, female, and aliens alike. Including my best friend, who is an utter fuckhead right now and whether she is wondering or not why I have not been calling, well, she can carry on wondering. Her trying to infiltrate my life with that negativity and man-hating shite. Just because she has issues with her guy doesn't sit pretty with me. For now, I have chosen not to exist to her (for the last week or so), which also included 'my guy.' Factually, I already ghosted him, but he didn't know that I steered him towards it on purpose. I have more interesting fish to play with; I needed him out the way.

When I decided to go back to the dating scene a few months ago, I walked in with a different outlook, mindset and strategy. Oh yes, there is a strategy to it, that's if you're serious about meeting someone of value. Unfortunately, my original faith in 'my guy' was wholly disappointed during/after the first date when I realised his manipulative tactics. So I fucked him right back (and took the sex). The guy is most likely feeling all-powerful and decisive right now, LOL. Although his actions were flawed, deceptive and just ridiculous (especially with having a degree in psychology, lmao), I am secure enough in my self-esteem to let him think what he needed so he could pander to his ego. Bless.

So I went out on an 8-mile walk today with twenty people from this new group I joined. Omg, the countryside was sooooooo beautiful; we walked through woodlands that had a trillion bluebells, footpaths and fields, and the people were so friendly, and some were a little bit funny too, a lady, in particular, I'll most likely warm to her more. The age range was 30 to 40 years olds, and when I met them, I was pretty pleased, common grounds, etc. I spoke to each of them throughout the three-hour walk, and the weather was terrific. Unfortunately, I couldn't even go for a fkn walk without two of the men making eyeballs on me. One guy kept walking right next to me even when I was chatting to other people; I don't recall his name because he is insignificant. The other guy called John, who was a little more impressionable, well-spoken and single as he told me all about himself. He asked for my number right at the end of the walk when we arrived at our car's. I didn't give it to him. However, I am joining them all next week for a coastal walk and pub stop along the way, and he said, "You're coming next week, aren't you?" I debated deterring the subject but thought fuck it, "Yes, I'll be there."

Then, if things were creepy enough, I've left in my car right, sunglasses on, tunes up, on my way home and stop in a petrol garage that is about 3 minutes from my house to get some bread. I fancied some avocado and eggs on toast. Of course, I had told many of them during conversations what area I lived in. It is a small village, so it is not rocket science to find it, and low and behold, the cling-on who stuck next to me the WHOLE walk was in the garage filling up his car, and when I got out of my car, he said, "Following me, are you. Hahaha," I thought, "No, you fkn plank, fuck off", lol but said, "Oh, haha. No, just getting some bread."

Im standing in the queue, and he comes in and is behind me and says, "So you liked it today?" I say, "Yes, I loved it!" he says, "So you'll be coming to more?" I say, "Yes, I will be." I pay for my bread, then say, "See you around, take care," and he said, "Oh, definitely".

How fkn creepy is THAT. Ughhhhhhhhh, I need a face transplant!

There were other guys on the walk too and nicely pleasant and the ladies. I enjoyed learning about them, where they were from and looking forward to spending more time with them. One lady, called Debbie, was telling me they do weekends away. The last one was in the Cotswolds. They do gig events too, and meals out, pubs etc. I told them I'm up for it. There are other groups also part of this organisation that I can go on walks and runs with, so I'll also meet more people, all local.

Paul, has sent a ton of messages throughout the day, which I hadn't answered because I was enjoying my day (lol) and a voice note on Whatsapp, telling me what he thinks of my profile photo. I.e. soulful eyes and lush, full lips that make him......blah blah blah. It made me cringe; my response was underwhelming.

Phil, got desperate and said, "If you get bored, you can call me if you like." - I am already bored with just that comment. I am not calling him.

Ed, sent morning message/s and "How's your day going, babe?" message. One thing I don't suffer is a man who is not mine, calling me "babe". Not responded to Ed.

Had a great chat with my sister-in-law and my dad, though. I think its time for a film and maybe, check out a dating app :)