If I die today
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ride it out
Its really on my mind it hit me yesterday the goverment owns healthcare. So its like this the govrment provides all this insurance then in insurance companny's approve or deny your treatment. And personally I've had expiernces where my insuracne back then was thru state said no and I couldnt turn around and try again to pay out of pocket for something. Anyhow the goverments got the funds that runs healthcare so healthcare is under the rieagn before you know it practicing medicine will be a goverment job. I dont know how else to fully express my thought but we;re owned man the goverment owns our bodies and runs the system. The pandmedic is really more of a legal issue than health issue bc its law take the jab cover your face dont touch you cant run your business unless you do xyz.. Anyhow this is hard for me to fully exsplain or express my thoughts but when funds for your physical health and well being are provided by the goverment you're owned. They got you. Ok so whats good with me? Im gassy guess thats not outside of a normal realm. Went for a bike ride yesterday on the tandem bike I'll admitI was scared but the bike works . I was just scared well bc I"m scared to ride a bike. nDea is actually a safer bike driver than automibile driver lol. Even thou we have no helmets I'm safer on that bike.. My wonderful goofy man. I ran 20mins olny yesterday wasnt sure what to exspect on this bike ride. The bike didnt seem like much a workout for me but my man says he got a workout my guess is he was doing all the work. The pedals did get away from me a few times he was peddling away. Then there was sex we missed 2 days and man i missed him . I am so not sure whats up with my pelivc zone so I sorta steared us to while him on top. No pain nothing usual so I think I'm back in the game so likely will be more aggressice and ease inot more postions again. I havnt told him I"m getting cramps for other postions now. Plus my furnitiure sux so myab postional. OR maybe some creepy weird shit is brewing and will develop down the road . Lets hope its all passed thou maybe I was on my verison of a period I dont get periods but I still have hormomes If I do die anytime soon thats gonna make it on my grave I gotta stop advertising that haha. The diet well I'm an overeater still no fresh produce but anyhow I made a steak lunch yesterday at the whole box of pasta and some steak geen beans and carrots. Then we had tacos for dinner I ate mine and then nDea was giving me some of his nacho's . oh well. I just got an email from an atty with a 100$ requested for an appointment to puruse this with a 3000$ retainer. I'm nervous that the price of attorney's has gone up since my last inquiries and I'll never be able to save enough. I have an apointment for a free consult on mondya my money should be here today I havnt called the bank yet but if it is Im hoping to get it out and hold it till I find someone to take my case for 1500 I just need to be legally free I cant find hte bastard to serve him or some corrupupt shit went down that noone will serve him. theres no kids no issues just that dam lease and Im sure they went to screw me too spedically since I"m the one that stayed local but do I dare exspect anyone to fight that for me. Ok so I' got this dam bill from 2019 from my ENT like 135 for freakin ear cleaning and the ENT office closed and so that particlar hospital does not have an ENT anymore its in a whole nother hosptial run and operated so I dont think I'm gonna pay it but I dont know the proper adult way to handle it. The bill was literally just processed so the dates correct it just got mailed. Its kinda frustating and this world pisses me off again. Anyhows I"m plannin on hangin around inside today mainly I do have to run to the dumpster my man is working in anotheer complex 2 days so today and tommorow ill not be here physcially till well after work so as far as creeps n stuff I gotta be more careful theres noone to look out for me. The winds are exspected to be increased today and so that makes me not wanna run in the dust and stuff outside. I have a bit of laundry today and IDK well this is life. Did I mention I am gonna live 125 years.. 90 years to go just to piss off the world that well didnt let me die now so screw that Im gonnado 125percent just to piss em off the world will not do me in now I'm so tired of this bullshit so when the time comes I'm gonna be indispensable in your face I will not die thats the plan 125% just to overcome ,