Nala Toph

Written Thoughts
2021-03-23 10:30:33 (UTC)

I don’t want to be a hero anymore

I don’t want to be a soldier, marine, nor sailor. Not even an airman nor guard. I’ve lost desire to be a firefighter, not that I’d want to be an arsonist. I don’t want to be living, not that I wish to die. But I want to give up what I have and be homeless. It sounds so easy. Easier in the sense of no responsibilities. I’m weak, I’m exhausted, I’m tired, and I’m a coward.

Do you know much about heaven? Does it even sound like paradise? They say you are pure and free from sin but, then am I even me at that point? I’m a slut, how do you erase that? Is there even the same music there? You take away my sins and I’m a very different person. Being lewd is like 50 percent off my personality. Is there no more pain? What if I like pain, what if I want to feel beaten and abused?

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