LuLu

My love affair with narcissists
2021-03-15 14:48:02 (UTC)

Depressed

I could barely wake up today. It's crazy because I haven't felt this tired in a long time. I think my depression is getting worst! This job is ok but I don't feel it if that makes any sense. Today they wanted us to meet at the shop because Big Boss will be in town. The shop is a disgusting College boy dirt pit. They smoke there and leave cans of beer around like wth. The bathroom is beyond disgusting and they want us all sitting there together in this small area and not one person wears a mask. Anyway I woke up with no desire to go in. Maybe it is the fact of everything I just described but also we are supposed to be there all day and then hang out at night for happy hour and dinner. Like who wants to be around the same people for 10 hours.. Anyway I made some excuse that the water was still leaking and I don't feel guilty about it. I don't know what I need to do maybe talk to my therapist again.. But she will tell me the reason I am depressed is this relationship!!!!

Yesterday we had a great day together which hasn't happened in a long time. It was a really good day and this morning he had my coffee mug and K pod ready for when I woke up. When it's good its good and when it's bad its really bad.




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