big fat gurl

How I got fat
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2021-02-19 00:53:51 (UTC)

Fat Fall Fracture

They are supposed to be my friends and help me but they do the opposite.
I guess they are helping but not how I want or need.

See,
I broke my ankle last March and its been a huge ordeal because it didnt just break.
Some of the bone was shattered.
I was coming out of the Post Office and fell on the stairs and my foot got caught on the railing post thing
and I fell. Twisted my knee and banged my head really hard and my ankle hurt so bad that I froze and then screamed.
and screamed
and screamed
Someone tried to help me get my foot out but it hurt even worse.
The paramedics got me out and when I looked at my knee it was bent at some impossible angle.
Ligaments and meniscus all messed up and my ankle was swelling and bent at a weird angle too and at least two bones were sticking out.
I could hear the paramedics but couldn't answer because the pain and the head bump.
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Surgery.
Pain killers helped but I still felt pain. A lot of pain but it was bearable so that I could talk.
They explained the surgery but I couldn't concentrate and didn't know what any of what they said meant other
than my leg was really messed up.
I woke up with a cast covering my leg from my upper thigh to my entire foot.
After the surgery medication wore off Laid there in shock.
-
Screws and screwed

Three screws, a pin and prolly some super and chewing gum.
They said between 4 weeks of nearly no moving at all and then 2-4 weeks more of light mibility.
At four weeks i went in for ex-rays. It hurt to move still.
They looked at the xrays and said things like, "hmmm that's not right" "weird, Iver never seen that before."
and when I asked what was going on they told me that they would let the doctor explain.
My back hurt so much from just sitting or laying all the time.

-
Healed Wrong
The doc said that the bones didn't heal right and they may have to do another surgery.
I was in shock and shaking and puked.
A week later I was getting opened up again.
Break and reset.
My BFF and sister helped me a lot.
For a long time they took turns staying with me.
Then the schools shut down and I ended up babysitting my BFF's kid.
He helped a lot.
-
I was never a vegan or or vegetarian or Mediterranean dieter.
By diet I dont mean losing weight I just mean my every day diet.
But
I ate healthy.
Whole grains, fruits, vegetables. lean meat. A burger once in a while.
My weakness is sugar.
The cravings for sugar was off the chart.
And they obliged.
My diet changed from semi healthy to sugar, pasta and juice
Pasta with all the creamy sauce
Sugar.... Swiss Rolls, Reeses Cups, Cookies, Cake, And my go to: brownie mix.

Yeah. brownie mix with no eggs and a little extra oil.
Mixed till there were still some lumps and they chilled or frozen.
There were days.
Too many days that I ate an entire brownie mix.
The pain meds kept me loopy
The pot they gave me made me relaxed and I didnt care that i didnt care.
Pounds of blubber piled on.
I wore sweats or pajamas all the time so I didnt know how bad I was getting.
I mean, I knew i was gaining, I had to be. but not like this.
-
I hope you all are okay and surviving Covid.
I'm going to lay back down and write laterrr.




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