Nicole

THE DOWNFALL OF MY MENTAL HEALTH
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2021-02-12 22:13:22 (UTC)

The more you pretend to know ..

The more you pretend to know me, the more I consider beating the odds and punching your teeth out. I don't give a damn about you. In fact, if it were up to me, I would've cut you off months ago. However, since you started dating the one person I'm trying to protect, I have no choice but to trust her. Hear that? I trust her. Not you. I care about a very small amount of people and you're sure as hell not one of them. Remember when you called me robotic and cold? Dig that deep into my past again and you'll see how cold I can get. I gave you a taste before, didn't I? I can’t stand that it’s still me waiting for a message that someone else is never going to send. I let you into my heart, you seared a place there that’s never going to be unmarked. It’s going to be you forever. And you hopped completely out of my life. I have to wait for you to come back. I have to be okay with your absence instead??? I said I wanted to give up and you punched me in the jaw. Your love is too tough sometimes. But now I know if I tried anything again you would find me. Sounds ominous, I'm stuck with you forever regardless of what happens. Great. I know you fucking suck and use tactics to get me back into the toxic cycle we go threw I’m done with it I really am... i am not letting a toxic person back into my life just because you put my ship as your pride week banner. but now i do feel guilty. i knew i should’ve just blocked you like everyone said. i can’t even think about that show anymore without wanting to die. I hope you would just tell me how much you hate me in my face. I know I did stupid shit, but I wasn't the only one. Honestly you're just as bad as I was and I wish we never met. you were both the best and the absolute worst that has ever happened to me.


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