If I die today
2021-02-12 06:53:25 (UTC)

hateful hurtful advice

Its important to me for nDea to be free weather with me or with someone else or as a bacholor I feel like he's been so minuplated and taken adavatge of and mentally enslaved. It sorta pisses me off . I"ve profiled this woman I dont wanna hate literally and I've never met her and lets be real I olny know what I hear from him.. I'm feeling really guilty bc even thou in my righteous mind I can justify that well I'm nice I'm not being hateful.. Guess what I resent her and I've judged her so I'm ready to change my mind and I"ve also found that me myself the things I say and maybe do can sway a mans mind. So I think I need to change my thinking and attidudes and butt out let him handle what he will. So things arent right but he has to find his path to freedom not me. Doesnt mean while were here that I cant love and support him but I cant really try to rope him in or suggest how he handle the situation he presents to me. I'm not there and I dont know it all and I assume a lot. I mean ive heard her on the phone and a few things i see lead me to think shes a bit wicked but theres more to it than what i know and see .. Im anxious and worried about a lot of things thou and I cant completely depend on him. I know that its not a jeoparising of our relationship but I also know she can influence his availability and his conidtion and ability to do things bc an exhausted person isnt too productive . I dont wanna die hating her thou or giving him bad advice that points to what I believe is best bc maybe I dont know best. likely I dont know.. ha. Its not up to me to find his way. I just want to see some bounderies. NOt even nessarily out for justice here or judgement just let the man have a life. Cell phone is still wrecked IDK what to do about it. Gotta figure all that out. Reguardless of its is hacked or not IDK i just need to figure out what I need and want to do with it or without it kinda sucks not getting text or not being able to send them or this like 2hour delay mid converstation but what do ya do. anyhow back to if I die. Not too much to say phyiscally thats unusually suspect about me at this time. I dont have any like major nagging cocerns as far as people things that I've muffled inside or whatever. Not much to say about this world that isnt already expressed.