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2021-02-07 16:26:10 (UTC)

ababadodotitem

Listening to some French chansons from 1930s and 40s. should i grab some coffee? nah I haven't done anything worthy. Let's see day 3 of not jerking off, I feel like my synapses are working again lmao. Wait I have done something worthy, nah not yet. So if I have no personality, I should atleast have some passion. I've been working with a friend to write some story and then I sleep for a week before I chat him again. So I think i'll self-cure my narcolepsy and have atleast something going on with my life. I feel like people died in 2016 and now we live with holograms, no like the worthy ones have transferred somewhere else and the unworthy ones has to live with holograms, you know holograms they can control, the one who acts with their feelings. Nowadays if someone is fat, you can't call them fat, cause then you'll be fatphobic. We are forced to live in a world full of roses and rainbows even if there is more pollution than oxygen around us. We chose to believe in a lie because it's convenient .LOL.
How do they never get tired? I'm done with happiness, it's all just a feeling anyways, a good uplifting feeling. A deadly currency too. The moment you think you need happiness in order to live, Example. You need this type of food, you need this person so that you can live your day, fuck, you're fucked but at the same time: GOOD ur feeling something, i'm kinda envious tbh. I wonder what does it feel to love someone. I don't even love my parents. Well that's for another c o n t e n t. I lost my point. Well if you think you need to be in a certain way to do something, and to be that something you need to be dependent unto something. Then that's gonna be hard to maintain and it's not a good investment, a more good investment is to be comfortable with your ever-so changing self. I too suffer from my mental unstabilty. I wake up and ask " now who the fuck am I today?" I do know at the end of the day but then tommorow I don't know again. I'm sure you've heard of this but I think it SHOULD be repeated again, how you program yourself at the start of your day controls your whole day. So don't scroll into horny twitter at the beginning of the day and lean it into something brain stimulating such as news or philosophy, anything for a food for thought. I never really understood those appreciating things kinda morning. Like yeah they gave me this things cause they are supposed to do it. Probably when I make my own decisions they are gonna be there and act like a mOthEr and a FaTHer. like woooooow I suddenly have parents now, where are u 16 years ago? My advice for teenagers who likes sex, atleast wear protection. That'll save you from future domestic abuse from your forced spouse, if they even can do that much. Oh I understand now why I don't care, I'm a masochist so I don't care if get homeless the next day. Is that even masochism? hmm but like if I get homeless here, it's not really an interesting city, no library, no parks even if the name of our subdivision has a park in it. so IDK how I would spend my fun here. I'll probably have sex with some vendor then steal there foods and go on a travel until I go to vietnam and then meet my friend. idk how to swim but I know i'll get there. Now that sounds like a good story aha. oof speaking of story I'm supposed to tell you two of my stories but nah next time byebye goodnight.


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