If I die today
2021-01-17 08:38:51 (UTC)

Well if I die today

Well if I die today, ugh so I've had vodka yesterday such a minute amount thou We shared so IDK what the damges may equal too. It was great worth it I suppose . Vodka and craberry about 8/10ths craberry in a solo cup shared with the man we went thru about 3 cups so it wasnt anything that should equal to a toxic amount. I'm sure thats fascinating to know but shit lifes funny the human body is picky also I had a single 5m flexiril right at bed so I took one went lights out stright to bed it was like 11. Nothing to overwhelming. In the physical also IDK why I'm freakin consitipated like 3 days now.. I hate this body so going to make some really really powerful coffee when I'm off here and get some balck beans going. could be stress? maybe I dont see much in my diet that should trigger a back up other than the pizaa was loased with cheese wendsday and of course I added more cheese. Guess it doesnt take much to make a change. basicly all day yesterday spent with Ndea its really hard to find stuff to do since everything is closed so we went to beaver bark and the mall and then target we were gonna get a game but somehow settled for just the vodka and cranberyy and planned on using the uno I have but uno didnt happen we just snuggled a lot and talked and kissed. He was just ingonring his phone he doesnt want to have to lie or hide anthing and I dont wnat him to either so anyhow we know the talk is coming very soon bc we;re not doing this. So will see how that goes even if not with me he should be free to date. I dont have any inimate threats on my health or life and I think theres soo much more to what life is gonna be for me but I could be wrong. I'm just trying to put together pieces . I suppose I should try to find a purpose in this day other than Ndea and well cleaning the apartment. Not much else I have on the mind right now to share if I should go