This Is It - 2021
2021-01-05 00:00:00 (UTC)


Hey Diem,

Spent a lot of today playing on my XBOX. I forgot how fast time flies with a controller in my hand. Looked up at one point to see it was nearly three hours later than I'd thought it was. Which was fine, since it was late, but still a surprise.

Ate dinner with the family tonight, which isn't actually that uncommon with us, but still less common than it used to be. When my sister and I were little, we used to sit at the table and eat together every single night. No one ate until everyone had food, and no one left until everyone was done. And we still follow those rules now, just... It was every night. The four of us (or three, if my dad was closing) around the table talking about...whatever it is children talk about at dinner. Fantasy, probably.

Everything seemed so big then. Everything still feels so big now. But I feel...smaller, somehow. Not in a bad way, not like insecurity. I think I just have a better grasp of how long Eternity is, how far the Horizon goes. Life is so big and I am so small but I am so big and life is so short. Growing up has made everything feel smaller and everything feel bigger and I think I may just need some sleep.

My sister started back on classes. It's her last semester of high school, then she's off to college like me. Where will she end up? How many more family meals will we have before our ideas of who our family for meals is has changed all together? I wonder what our kids will tell us about during dinner.

Fantasy, probably.