Do Not Disturb

2020-12-26 17:52:30 (UTC)

The Day After Christmas

Yesterday was Christmas day. I didn't do much. But its not the presents that counts... Right? I saw Carl and we had sex once he came over even though I kept begging him to stay he said he had to go. I mean... How are you gonna hav sex with me then leave ? Then he said next time I can spend the night but when next time is it exactly. I'm starting to regret all of this. I even texted him Merry Christmas but when I said something about sex he'll respond back and quick too. Gosh, I feel so stupid with the decisions I make with guys. He said he's not ready for a relationship but then... What are we ? Friends with benefits? I even to asked him that he said no.

My mother asked if we had sex in her house. But how did we have sex in her house when it's in my room. I said yea but she only asked because I thought I sent a certain message to Carl but I made a mistake and sent it to my mother and she read it figured. I was like... Oh shit!

So, maybe Carl read my messages and didn't respond but it always shows a little check when he sees the messages. I don't know. He doesn't even wanna be on the phone with me everytime I cal him. And I believed every word he said because I got attached to him when we had sex. I hate that about me.

But then again I'm an adult. At least it was in MY room. But see if I was at Carl house and we'd had sex it would be different. I gotta get my own place but at the looks of it that's not happening any time soon. I'm focusing on still getting my license right now since I failed 3 times last time without really studying but my mother passed. 🙄


And they say that girls are complicated.