I don't even know
Ad 2:
2020-12-01 03:41:56 (UTC)

Numb But Emotional

Dear Diary,
I feel so numb, but at the same I'm feeling too much. I just wanna be at peace. I'm not talking about dying, but maybe stop existing. I want people to forget me. I wish that I never existed. This life is....sad? Boring? I don't know. My eyes feel heavy, but I don't wanna sleep. I wish I had someone to talk to. A friend. A stranger. A loved one. But there's no one. I just wanna die already. I'm too much of a coward to kill myself. But maybe one day I will. If I ever do, would I regret it? The only thing that's really keeping me going is my family. But even they can fuck up. I wanna text a hotline right now, but I'm not sure. I mean, it's their job to professionally handle situations like this. Besides, I don't think I could text one even if I wanted to. My phone won't let me, and I don't wanna do it on my parents phone. I just wish I could disappear.