Amethyst

I don't even know
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2020-11-13 03:19:13 (UTC)

Thinking Too Often

Dear Diary,
The thoughts keep coming in. Ever since I wrote about how I think about suicide, my brain just starts bombarding me with emotions and thoughts. Almost everytime I look at something sharp, my brain says "cut yourself". It's fucking me up. Sometimes I go to my balcony and start breaking down. "I said I would never do it, so why am I thinking about it?! Am I seriously contemplating suicide? Why?!". Those thought would cause something like a breakdown a little. I'm just so overwhelmed on the inside, but I can't show anything on the outside. I'm just, so tired, of everything. School, pressure, family, social media, body image, living; everything! Okay, okay....calm down. Let's just talk about something else. I've recently found this artist called Shiloh Dynasty. I can't believe that I've gone for so long without ever hearing about him.


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