The Jigsaw

The Final Game
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2020-10-19 01:11:36 (UTC)

Fate

I remember watching Dark Fate in the theaters. i got emotional in the end as i did in judgement day. I looked around and saw the people engrossed in the action and didn't quite get the ending and how it would be to someone who is a fan. It's like when someone says that Stars Wars is just a movie you got nothing to say to them. You have lost them. you can't relate with them no more. With so many bad reviews on it i didn't know why. I enjoyed it.

Depressed i am. I can feel it the weight of nothingness. Haven't been online or talked to anyone in a few days. Just work and thats it. I'm like a hermit in a fucking lockdown. I don't know what to do or when it will end.

I got so many ideas but no will to execute. Just sleep or do nothing. No purpose for living except work or family obligations. no chance of marriage. single for so long i forgot what being in a relationship is. forgot the warmth of the human touch. corpse from the outside slowly dying from within.

So many disappointments you give up on trying to be happy or content. every disaster is just a mehhhh for you now. just waiting for things to decay and rot away eventually. why try. its not self pity what is talking. but just so fucking tired. just one day i want to feel loved or wanted. just one.


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