ER

the road to my misery
2020-10-08 22:38:52 (UTC)

why can’t she understand

I have been so stressed out and anxious. I need a week off of school. I just want one weekend where i’m not stressed out.

Today a worker from light and water came and they were knocking at the door. My sister answered . They then knocked again and I didn’t feel like answering ( gotta love social anxiety) so I called my sister so she can answer.

Her fucking mouth has to tell everything to everyone (aka my mom in this case) that I didn’t want to answer the door so I went to go call her. Here’s come them talking shit how I didn’t want to answer the door. Don’t they fucking know that I have social anxiety come on now it’s not a fucking secret! My mom doesn’t understand my anxiety so I stopped talking about it so much to her. So it pissed me off when my sister brought that up her knowing that I have social anxiety. In the middle of them talking shit I told them well sorry that I social anxiety. I felt like crying when they were talking about it.

They don’t know anything about me having anxiety 24/7. I struggle with it morning to night. I don’t fully know how to dealt with it. I am still learning how to deal with it without anyone’s help. I don’t talk to anyone about my anxiety and when I do I don’t tell them everything or they are no help so it makes me not want to talk to them about it.

I told my mom that I need a break from my sister, we are home together 24/7. I also told her that maybe I just need to get out the house. My mom then tells me “ you don’t even want to answer the door” I just stood quiet after because I am officially done talking to her about my anxiety she doesn’t get it and there’s no way she can. I just accepted it.




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