andrew61

Confessions of a Slacker
2020-08-02 21:11:35 (UTC)

It all fell apart.

And as of Friday afternoon, I found myself suddenly homeless. My address this week is a Super 8 motel in suburbia. I can't really afford it, but for now I have to.

They kicked me out. Joe wanted to send me to a homeless shelter if I couldn't go stay with a friend, but I'm not doing that as long as I have some cash and credit in reserve.

Joe said I was coming between him and Jim. He said he yelled at Jim that he would leave him if he kept "coddling" and "babying" me. So here I am.

And Phillip went off on me really bad Thursday night. He accused me of "taking advantage" of them. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

Long story short: The house got infested with bedbugs, and they blame me, which I feel is unwarranted.

And my copy of that paper Jim and Joe both signed, granting me three more months' tenancy, mysteriously disappeared from my bedroom somehow.

So here I am, in a motel room with all my personal belongings. I can't afford to stay here too long. I've got to find an affordable place to live very quickly. Within a week, two at the most.

I can't bring myself to get into more details right now. It's all for the best that I've moved out, as all three of them apparently resent me, although Jim has been more understanding than the other two, who are not even able to listen to a different point of view. But Jim won't cross Joe on this because he doesn't want to lose him. I can't fault him for that.

I'm dreading what I have to do next -- look for rooms to rent, and in a hurry -- but there's no way out of it. My anxiety is through the roof right now.

At least I have some cash saved up. I didn't touch most of my stimulus money from April, and now hopefully more is on the way soon. Better off than two years ago when I moved in with Joe, with only $40 cash to my name.

~~~~~~~~~

I've just experienced a synchronicity of sorts, which I find comforting.

About two weeks ago, I dreamed of a man I used to work with long ago, and whom I haven't seen in more than twenty years. I can't recall anything about the dream except that he was in it.

Then, sometime last week, a video of a Sunday service at a Unity Spiritual Center in the Cleveland area crossed my Facebook news feed for some unknown reason. I didn't take the time to watch it just then, but saved it for future viewing.

This weekend, I received a reminder that it was still there as an Unopened Save. (Turns out that the motel where I'm staying is near the place.) This afternoon I decided to watch it.

My jaw dropped open. Midway through the video, the meditation was given by the same man I dreamed about that I knew all those years ago!

I then Googled him along with that Unity location, and watched another video where he was the guest speaker. I was stunned. He alluded back to his life in 1987, which was the very year I transferred to his department and met him!

I never realized he was so spiritual.

I'm reminded that I'm a divine child of God, and if I just let go of worry and anxiety, and go with the flow, I will be guided by the Divine to the best possible solution to my predicament. I've got to hold on to that and have faith. Everything I need will come to me.




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