Diary name
Ad 2:
2020-07-26 21:26:13 (UTC)


I know that I am not a bad person. Bad people commit mass genocide. Bad people think others' misery is pleasurable to an extreme. Bad people believe their wants are more important than others' basic needs. I have not committed mass genocide. I do not get pleasure from misery. I do not believe my wants are more important than others' needs.

I also know that I am not a good person. Good people preform miracles. I do not. Good people risk their lives for others. I do not. Good people to extraordinarily spontaneous acts of kindness. I do not.

I am one of those middle people. Sometimes I will take more than I need because I want to. Sometimes I will giveaway all that I have to someone else. I've never done anything extraordinarily bad or good. I am in the middle. I choose good sometimes. I choose bad sometimes. Usually I choose somewhere in the middle.

I am writing all this because I can't stop thinking about the girl who called me fake. I tried to blow it off, but it just keeps coming up. I confronted her about it and explained how I wasn't fake. I told her that just because I act different with different people doesn't mean I am fake. I wouldn't act like I was at a wedding at a funeral. I am not going to act the same to someone I dislike and with my best friend. I am also not going to treat someone I dislike rudely. I was raised to be nice to everyone. Even people I hate. This doesn't make me fake. I told her all that calmly and I was glad I said it, but I wish I would've told her that she's pushing her insecurities on me. I am doing fine over here. She is the one who needs to take a deep look into her soul.

I'm an asshole, but I am not a bad person. I have done shitty things, but I have never caused someone's death directly or indirectly. I choose kindness when I can, but as the saying goes: Evil is always possible and goodness is eternally difficult.

If anyone wants to hash out ethics with me send me an IM.