Kailan and I broke up... he still wanted to be friends and i told him to come over if he needs a safe place. I don’t want us breaking up to be an excuse for his grandmother to be more abusive. I kept my promise at least; broke up in person, because he begged me to do it that way. It hurts a lot more because I don’t want to see him cry but i know for him it hurts a whole lot more.
As for why, kinda the same reason I broke up with my boyfriend in Germany. There’s wasn’t a whole lot of cuddles; they’d rather be up and do things. While I’m sure Leon would have been more than happy to just snuggle with me, perhaps even for an entire day; the whole relationship was online and I needed to be held so closely to my lover. Kailan is a good person, he cares but he can be a little selfless. Which only goes into caring but still, can be hard to love someone who doesn’t love themself. He wanted to buy me things at the mall but.. my feelings can’t be bought. I never see a price and think that equals love. Buying me things makes me uncomfortable. Around the holidays it’s fine, and it’s a bit if a fault i have on how much i may expect it. Other than that please don’t ever pour your wallet to me, I’d much rather just be held in your arms; squeezed tightly. Kailan didn’t enjoy snuggles, and that’s just a big no for me. Cuddles are my biggest need in a relationship.
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