Do Not Disturb

2020-06-23 20:36:37 (UTC)

Talked To My Therapist

Talked to my therapist over the phone this morning from a private number and basically I told her how I met this guy over Facebook that I've been talking to for about two weeks now who went to the same school as me but graduated a little later going on three and how he has a girlfriend but their on a break and how I feel about if, their getting back together or not. And that it hurts me that they still talking and checkinh up on each other and wondering if I'm just someone to keep him company till they get back together then he's just gonna abandon me just like that. He says he's not. I really do like this guy. He picks me up from work takes mehome. We spend time with each other when we're off from work. He comes to my house. I come to his but he comes to mine more. We cuddle, ect... We even had sex plenty of times before. He wore protection. Yes. But... I always wondered if, he ever mention to his gf about me and us just being friends but he did say that whatever happens between us stays between us and that nothings gonna chnage even if, he does get back with her and blah, blah, blah. He has her as his homescreen because I was being nosy and yes I saw it. They've been together for three years so of coarse he would. I wish I was with someone for that long but I wanna be with him for that long. He says he has all these depe feelings for me and says all these things that make me feel all butterflies inside but we're not together.n JUST FRIENDS. More of friends with benefits then anything if, you ask me and I told him that he says that's not the case. Then... What is the case ? I really like hanging out with C. I really do. But I know I'm hurting myself even more because he has a girlfriend even though he's on a break and they check up on each other every now and then. And he does that with me to just friends wise when I wanna be something more. She has Facebook too. And through messenger I saw he put her as my queen. I wanna be his Queen too.


The pain. It hurts so much and I don't think he understands like he says he does. It be even before I even worse fall in love with him. One day.

Mood : Heartbroken 💔

- A

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