matthewscarrie847

Carrie notes
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2020-06-06 04:29:16 (UTC)

My Emotional Scares

You won't ever see my scares because they are emotional scares I have gotten over the years! They were caused by many people, things, or events that have happened in my life!
William Lee Byrd I married you December 18 1992. Little did I know you just wanted a sugar momma. We had 2 children and I became not only the soul support of the house, but your punching bag. I kept telling myself that I had to stay with you for the kids. That lasted until the day I came home from work and I caught you in bed with your brother's wife. That was the day I took my last beating from you and I filed for divorce. Yep, after 3 1/2 years and 2 children I was done with you.
When I left William Byrd I gave up the kids for adoption. Why? I couldn't take care of myself let alone 2 children. I was in a homeless shelter and I couldn't put my kids through that hell. Don't get me wrong I love my kids. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of my kids.
Jay Eaton I met you when you were dating my one time best friend Rosemary Johnson. I helped her get away from you because you mistreated her. So I knew better than to hook up with you. Oh, but 20 years later I moved in with you, what a fool I was. You kept me from my family and even though you were the crazy person you tried to pin that on me. Really you would start talking to me, then mid conversation start acting like your dead mother was talking to me.
Tom Snow you were a real winner you worked for a living. Yet you never paid your bills. More than once I turned the power back on for you even after my aunt was my payee. Oh and the people you would drag home that never put a dime in the house for food, rent, or utilities. You were a free loader who ran around with free loaders.
Of course there are people who lived in Mountain Home when I left Jay Eaton and William Byrd who used me for my money. But to hear her tell it she was helping me. The first time I stayed with her I still had my kids and the guy she was dating told me I had have sex with him or get out of my friends house. Of course I went packing and went to the homeless shelter where I lost both my kids to adoption. In time I forgave the gal and I stayed with her one last time before I left Mountain Home. I sent money to her son who had been in prison, gave her other son money for food for his kids, and paid for dish services for her for a month.
Now I only mentioned a few cases here there is so much I went through in my life. There were times I went to jail because of poor choices I made either in people or in actions. I admit that I'm no angle and my life has not exactly been roses. But with God's help I made it to where I am today.
I don't allow others to use me as their puppet. I stay in my apartment a lot these days. I only come when I go for walks or to the store. Now that Idaho is reopening slowly I can go to the gym.
Just remember people if you think I'm a bitch I went through a lot of hell before becoming that bitch. I can stand on my own 2 feet and without anyone helping me. I may have the emotional scares from everything I went through, but I'm still standing.


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