Kenji

Queen of Nothing
2020-06-03 01:42:52 (UTC)

It was YOU all along.

After all these years, I finally realized that I'm the one who did you wrong. You were my best friend, you actually cared, you kept me motivated, you talked to me they way i want to be talked to, you respected me, made jokes with me, called me cute and took an interest in my life. However, now it's too late to even apologize. And all of that for what?! Just because i didn't wan't to be involved with your family (and honestly the are too much for me to handle), and I did not want anyone to make fun of us because you know we are the marginalized and outcasted ones.
I AM SORRY. I never got to tell you that, but I am. I didn't mean to break your heart, it was all because of my insecurities, I was too scared to make a move. But you know too well that it's not all on me, you may have expressed your feelings towards me in a way, but you NEVER made a move. No, saying "I love you" in seventh grade to me doesn't count. I think that's for the best, although I'm certain that my life would be better if you in it.. Maybe you're better off without me. I'm a mess, I don't know what to feel, think or do right now. But all i want is... for you to be OK.
I guess i refused to admit to myself how i felt about you, but all these years i have been rejecting guys, and now i realize that it's because of you, deep down i always thought that I'd end up with you.
Now i realize that I... I love you.




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