Pleasantly Disturbed

Broken Glass Park
2020-05-25 23:37:33 (UTC)

Why I'm Content And At Peace ☺☺☺

I don't know how to describe what I have felt since Friday. Is this like enlightenment? Am I truly in the acceptance part of grief and how did I get here? And yes, it's like enlightenment to me because I feel like I have broken free of all thoughts that were harming me.

You would think that by already fulfilling a great purpose that that would make me lazy and unmotivated to go on with the rest of life. It's doing quite the opposite. I have so much energy all the time and it's not that frenetic, hyper, nervous or angry energy. It's mellow, mild, subtle. I feel like I'm one with The Force or something! ... Lol. I'm awake. I'm alive. I don't know why I am still here, but I am so very happy that I was there for my husband in his last days.

And I know I could have done a better job, but you can't waste time regretting the past. I haven't helped many people in my life, if anyone, but he loved me and I really feel my purpose in life was to be with him in his last days on Earth.

I can live the rest of my life content and peaceful knowing I did that.

I love you, Monkey Man, forever.

Ad:0 - Modern SaaS monitoring for your servers, cloud and services