living the van life
watching videos of this dude riding out snow storms (and capitalism) in/with his van lately. cooking pizza in a skillet during a blizzard this one time. sipping beers. enjoying these small but visceral simplicities. he's made a brand and youtube channel out of it which detracts somewhat from the concept, but a fella's gotta grind.
my thoughts keep gravitating to and romanticizing the "off the grid", off social media, bare bones social ties approach to my own existence. fairly close in a few ways, pairing down relationships and things. permanently deleting facebook was key. tucking away in my apartment. i'd prefer to have zero part of the bastardized version of society that exists currently. it's so painful to pretend to give a shit. even during thiS pandemic. humanity has been hijacked by monsters who have sucked the joy and innocence out of everything up to and including the act of experiencing joy. for me at least. maybe it's "just depression". maybe gfdssddfffddddddgfdddddss
the chronic degenerative disease, as with everything, makes total feral off the grid lyfe unattainable, but my quest is one of minimizing my public, private and other such existence to the lowest allowable levels. goalzz