Rose

Roses Are Blue
2020-05-17 23:13:13 (UTC)

Unexpected

The past few days have been..interesting. A month ago I wrote a letter to my mum's friend Joanna. Well, their more of a family friend but anyway. I'm still waiting for Joanna's letter, I hope it gets here soon. The weekend just passed, we had beautiful weather. Cool, yet the sun was out and shining. Basically the perfect day for painting or gardening. Ever since quarantine started my Mum has been dead set on fixing up the house. So, everyday that has good weather we're outside either pulling Agapanthus (or "Lily of the Nile") roots out of the bricks and garden beds, or painting huge walls in white. I don't have any of my own "painting clothes", so Mum gave me one of hers. It has massive holes under the arms, so at least there is ventilation. The owner of next door has been hiring people to cut down the trees on his property, which is great for us because the trees would always hang over our drive way, dropping little seeds and flowers on the car. I used to be afraid of the plant so my psychologist told me to bring one of the flowers to his office and he would eat it. Turns out it was Oleander, a type of poisonous plant with flowers that if ingested can be deadly, so I'm glad I didn't kill my psychologist. The owner doesn't actually live there, he rents it to people. The last people that were there (a family) were supervised by the police, something to do with drugs I think. The parents would always fight and sometimes they'd leave their children outside. This little boy, probably 5 or 6, was always yelling about how he wanted to die. Definitely not nice when your trying to read a book. They left a few months ago. To be honest the property gives me such a bad feeling. It's set up really oddly, with a giant gate and a house that is situated diagonally. Most of the people who have lived there have been horrible. There was only one man who was alright, but he had this crazy girlfriend and at night you could hear bottles being thrown and people yelling. Maybe a murder happened there, idk? Just a weird-ass house. Since they cut down the trees on Saturday we all (my family) collected the bits of wood. Why? My grandparents have an open fire, so they wanted the wood since we're going into winter (Australia). But the thing is they can be picky, so I don't think I'd be surprised if they refused it. We got a lot, so if they don't want it we could sell it for profit; I mean, might as well ;) At lunch Mum said something really unexpected. My brother (He's about 12, I'm 15) asked why we hadn't changed the school photos. The photos were taken in 2016, so I was 12 and Stan (My brother) was 9. As a joke she said it was because we look so ugly. We had a laugh. She then kept going on, saying that we looked like shit and those photo were our peak. Stan protested but Mum told him that he should use the skin cream she buys him for his pimples. Mum and Dad were laughing. They took it too far. I know my mum is really insecure about her looks, as she is overweight. She rarely takes photos of herself and complains about it while eating chocolate biscuits. I've told her countless times to work out and ditch the sugar, as that's the only way to lose weight but she can't. No matter what I say she still refuses. Then she gets stuck in this loop. A few weeks ago she tried giving up Coke,... it lasted three days. I'm proud of her trying though, but these days I've just given up worrying about it. She has made her decision, hopefully she changes her mind from my example but that's just a hope. It's things like this that make me feeling hopeless but also upset, because I know if I said that she looked like shit I would get into trouble. I calmly told her that it hurt and tried to get her in my shoes, it worked and she apologised. My dad is reliant on my Mum, for reasons I'll explain in another entry. It just hurts, you know? Anyway I've decided to try Chloe Ting's 2 week ab challenge, which optimistically cautious about. I finished day one yesterday and I was so tired, but I felt super happy. I don't workout at all, so I don't think that has ever happened to me before; I'm excited to see how it goes.

PS: Another neighbour has moved out and they're knocking down her house, it's loud, but sounds cool.

(Names are changed for privacy reasons)




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