༺ ♡.PINKY.♡ ༻

Ramblings & RL Stories
Ad 2:
2020-04-11 12:30:22 (UTC)

Good Friday

Saturday 4/11/20

Been up 2 1/2 hours

Couldn’t sleep.
Mind is full.

I wanted to SH last night (10 outa 10)
But I didn’t.
The urge was strong.

I’ve been in a depressed state since yesterday afternoon. (10 outa 10)

I said something wrong, and/or it was taken wrong, I’m so confused, I can’t tell which.

I just know, to watch what I say. I don’t like upsetting people, hurting people. When that happens, I do, I blame myself. I can’t help I’m a little more callous than most. That’s from all the heavy walls I have built around my heart.

I personally, don’t see why people who say they love and care for me do. Is it all just a ploy? A game? I don’t understand. It’s sad when you can’t find positivity in yourself, but others claim they do, but your own family have nothing good to say about you, so how can outsiders see it?

I didn’t do much yesterday, other than laundry.
I’ve not been feeling the greatest.

That’s just my update for today, will be working on Chapter Four the next day or so.