Canadian Cutie

Life through my spiritual eyes❤️
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2020-04-04 20:24:00 (UTC)

In you, are poems that aren't meant to be read❤

Listening to: Titanium - Madilyn Bailey
You shout it out
But I can't hear a word you say
I'm talking loud not saying much
I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet
You shoot me down, but I get up
I'm bulletproof nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
Ricochet, you take your aim
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down but I won't fall, I am titanium
~~~
“In you, are poems that aren't meant to be read by everyone” ― R.H. Sin
~~~
Good Evening! 🌙
Today was a wonderful day all things considering. Still on a stay home order and I been adhering to that, although I spent most of it outdoors in my backyard. Beats in my ears and worked my butt off. It's looking so beautiful in my yard. I have a very large yard and when I moved here, the backyard was a fully blank slate, nothing there. I have not done much but maintain it, until this year. I am creating plans on how I want it to look this year. I want to make it my tranquil place this summer. I planted two lilac bushes last year. They hold such a strong meaning to me. I think I wrote about it in my past entries but lilacs were my Daddy's favorite, our driveway was lined with them growing up. The smell takes me back to my time with him. I have been searching for good, full bushes but only last year found 2, I am on the hunt again this summer. I want to plant several more. It's a brief enjoyment as they only bloom for a short period in the early summer but it's worthwhile and where they are planted, a nice cross breeze and open windows, it blows a nice scent into my home. I am going to plant more grass seed too or have it sprayed in the grass seed. I want lush grass and a few gardens. I am even considering having a gazebo built further in the yard. My puppy was outside with me all day. He loves it as much out there as I do. I got quite a bit accomplished. Tomorrow I will be out there doing more, hopefully, the weather is as good then as it was today. Was sunny and just perfect temperature at 14 I think?

One thing I love about losing myself in my backyard is a lot of time to just think. Lost in music, It's been good therapy. It has given me a good time to reconnect with myself. I feel like I lost myself a bit in the last while. I have felt the situation of what's going on in the world getting to me emotionally. As an empath, I am really sensing and taking on the emotions of others. If I go out for necessities, I get overwhelmed lately, more so than I usually do. I do not make eye contact but don't need eye contact to feel their feelings, they just consume me just being around others so this solace in my own space has really helped me get back to me, focus on me. it's those times I need more of. Shut everything off and just focus on me. I promised myself more of those. I need to make myself my first priority more than I have in the past. I have always put others before myself, no more. I am just as important. It takes a pandemic to realize how much I have neglected myself. Not again. While I am hopeful this #stayhome ends soon. I am thankful for this time I am getting to myself, for myself.

Wow, I can babble lol, I want to find a movie to watch in bed. I watched a really good movie the other day called "God's Compass", it was really good. I recommend it. Think I will end it here, I already had my bath (neener SS lol)
Until tomorrow, Goodnight ❤


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