andrew61

Confessions of a Slacker
2007-05-27 00:00:00 (UTC)

I am such an idiot.

I have no reading comprehension whatsoever. I can’t read.

Off I trotted Saturday morning to look at the house I mentioned where a guy has a room available for rent. I got up at 9 am, which is rather painful for someone who normally sleeps until 11:30 or noon, so I could make the morning appointment.

I first stopped at McDonald’s across from Wrigley Field, which is about halfway to the guy’s house, for a couple sausage biscuits plus some iced tea. One of the downsides to always sleeping so late is that I almost never get to have sausage biscuits at McDonald’s — my favorite breakfast item there. But since I was up early today, I decided to treat myself. But I was so nervous about possibly being late for my appointment that I ended up just wolfing them down… I don’t think I even really tasted them. What a shame.

But I digress.

The house I looked at looks totally unassuming and unspectacular from the outside… just another old, nondescript wood-framed bungalow, wedged in between two other old houses (very close together). In fact, the front porch and steps even looked a little shabby… peeling paint…

But inside — wow! The house was breathtaking. A total gut renovation.

A young Asian guy let me in. He said he was the owner’s cousin, just visiting. He directed me towards the back of the house where the owner, Mike, was already showing the place to some other prospective tenants — two young women from Los Angeles who are transferring to Chicago, I presume.

You’d never know it from the street, but the front room of the house is a “great room”… huge, sparsely furnished… just a sectional and a television, and then a piano at the far end.

The kitchen is large and completely redone… granite countertops, professional-grade stainless steel appliances… then, going even further back there is a huge sun room with high windows. I could tell from the style of the windows that this section of the house was obviously an add-on at some point.

Four bedrooms, three baths upstairs… the baths are completely redone with Italian marble and whatnot. The master bedroom in the back is Mike’s, it’s large with cathedral ceilings and a ceiling fan. There’s a small, dark bedroom off to the side from the hallway that is currently occupied by two German guys who are going to be moving out at the end of August. Mike is not planning on replacing those tenants… he said something about turning that bedroom into his “music room”.

And now for why I am such an idiot and can’t read.

Mike showed us the front bedroom, which he said was the one available. A medium-sized room with hardwood floors and one window that faces the street. To my surprise, it was already empty… no furniture. I got confused when Mike told us, “This is the room I have for rent… it’s available immediately.”

Immediately? But I thought it was available August 1!

I mentioned this to Mike, and now he was the one confused. He said he hadn’t put anything in the ad about it being available August 1, but I was sure he had.

One of the young women had printed out a copy of the ad, and had it with her. I asked if I could take a quick look at it. Sure enough, Mike hadn’t said any such thing. I had somehow read something into the ad that just wasn’t there!

My heart sank. I felt like a complete fool.

When I found the ad in craigslist’s “Rooms/Shares” section, I had input August into the “Search” box, and Mike’s ad was one of those that turned up. So I somehow assumed his ad said the room would be available August 1, but in reality, the reason it turned up in the search was only because he’d mentioned late “August ’07” as the time the other two guys would be leaving.

I must’ve read that ad ten times over the past couple days, and all that time I was reading something that wasn’t there. How could I miss such an important detail?

Mike continued to show us the rest of the house… the laundry facilities in the unfinished basement… the large back yard… the deck… I followed along, but my heart wasn’t in it anymore.

It’s a splendid house… I loved it… completely redone… red oak hardwood floors and recessed ceiling lights throughout, along with the other features I mentioned… it’s what in this part of Chicago is considered a million-dollar house… or close to it.

But it looks like I won’t be taking the place. He really wants to get someone for June 1, but I don’t need it for two more months, and I don’t think he’d want to hold it for me for that long. If I took it now, I’d have to pay double rent (on two places) for two months, and I’m just not interested in doing that.

I was all excited for the past two days… For $1000 a month, all inclusive, I was going to get to live in a million-dollar house and have the place all to myself most of the time once the other two guys moved out, because Mike had told me he’s rarely home… he’s a medical professional who works hard, plus he has a lot of social engagements outside the home and travels a lot. I would be living in a truly stunning environment, where I would have my peace and quiet, for $300 less than I’m paying now.

But I guess it’s not to be.

When I apologized to Mike for the misunderstanding, he said, well, maybe the room will still be vacant later on if no one takes it, and I can still rent it… he’s not in a big hurry to rent it out. I did take an application form with me, but I’m not too hopeful. I don’t believe it will sit empty very long… it’s a great place and it will rent fast.

Maybe it’s for the best. I’d noticed the one house next door was up for sale, and it didn’t look like that great of a place, which set off alarm bells inside my head. Let me explain.

I asked Mike if he knew anything about the house next door, and he said, “Yeah, they’re asking $560K, but it isn’t worth it. It’s been up for sale for four years off and on… the owner keeps listing it and then removing the listing and relisting it again later, so it won’t appear to have been on the market so long.”

Then my question: “Is it a nice house that someone would actually want to live in, or is it a teardown?”

“It’s a teardown.” Yep, that’s what I’d feared.

In my part of Chicago, a “teardown” is when a ramshackle old house in a hot neighborhood sells for a very high price. The house could be literally leaning and falling down, and nobody’d want to buy it and live in it, but it will still fetch a high price just because the land underneath it is worth so much.

What happens is, a developer will buy the house just to get the land, tear the house down, and build a bigger, more upscale house in its place (one that could go for a million or more)… or else, a three- or four-flat “luxury” condo building where each condo unit sells for $400-$500K or more apiece.

Ugh! That means that if I moved there, that house next door could sell and construction could start shortly afterward, literally inches from the house I’m living in (that’s how close together those houses are… narrow, deep lots) producing tons of noise and dirt which could go on for the better part of a year. Sure, according to city law, they have to knock it off by 8 pm every night, but I’d be home during the day, dealing with the whole nuisance. I don’t know how people stand it.

But it looks like I’m not going to be moving there anyway, so it’s not my problem.




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