andrew61

Confessions of a Slacker
2018-12-22 00:00:00 (UTC)

More details on yesterday’s interaction

The Chinese meal I’d had three hours earlier had worn off. I’d had only unsweetened iced tea since then. I was getting weak and shaky.

I wanted two pies, but James was manning the front counter. I waited awhile to see if someone else would take over, but finally I couldn’t wait any longer and decided to deal with it.

I ordered from the kiosk, but had to step up to the front counter anyway as I was paying with cash. James, who had been very personable in his interactions with previous customers, just looked at me wordlessly. No greeting. I handed him the small kiosk receipt, equally wordlessly. He rang it up on the register and, in a barely audible voice, mumbled “One fifty.” Without so much as a grunt, I handed him a one-dollar bill and two quarters. My fingertips incidentally and unintentionally touched the palm of his hand. No words were spoken as he handed me my receipt.

A minute or two later, he handed me a small brown paper bag containing the pies. No “Have a great day”, not a word of any kind. He did, however, make brief eye contact and gave me a barely perceptible nod. And the exchange was over, just like that.

I know what I was feeling the entire time. But what was James feeling?

Anger? Discomfort? Embarrassment? A twinge of guilt? All of those things? And was the nod a signal that some part of him wanted things to be right between us again?

I’ve got a lot to overthink here.




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