Happy-04

Happy-04
2020-01-23 19:46:17 (UTC)

So I’m back, here to write ..

So I’m back, here to write down the life of my past. To write down what I have held In for so long. I don’t know if it will help but I’m going to try. I’ve not thought that using the word hate was ever a nice thing, but there are people out there that can be so ugly that you think why can’t you hate them. I’ve had so much anger toward people that I believe I hated them. Something can be so unforgettable that I wish you could forgive. But the real question is how. How can you forgive someone who didn’t seem to really feel anything towards you when they did what they did. How can you look at someone and still feel happy to see them. I guess Society make you think it’s ok life goes on. And it does but does it really go on for those who feel trapped. I feel like I was so much In a hurry to grow up in life that I never thought of the life I would give my own kids. I feel like everyone watches these stupid teen mom shows but damn are they fake. That’s awesome that they made money off of being pregnant at such a young age. But in reality that’s not what it’s fucking like. I don’t blame anyone for my life. my choices are mine and I own up to them everyday. My kids don’t have a horrible life and I don’t either because I work my ass off to make sure they have what they need. To make sure they have a mom to be there for them. To show them that there is a parent who loves them. Because we all no most the time young love doesn’t last. But I made sure my kids have one parent that stayed around. To show them how to be better adults to show them that life is hard but we make it through. To show them the unconditional love that everyone should feel. I’m in my thirty’s now and I still struggle everyday to provide the best I can for my kids. I’m not saying I’m perfect in anyway cause god knows the life my kids and I gone through isn’t the easiest. I just wish there was something out there for women that feel trapped , or are going through so much that they feel there isn’t anyone who would understand, or wouldn’t now how it feels. For them to know there are people who really do, there are people who have been there who have had some fucked up things happen and they are strong they are survivors. There needs to be more women support more people that make you feel like there is hope. I really wish I had that at times in my life. Cause the reality that the world holds now a days is so wrong and it sucks. I’ll vent more later until next time. :)




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