Lost Soul

~This Crazy Life Of Mine~
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2020-01-11 00:34:39 (UTC)


I have so much to say but nobody to hear it....

Tonight I’m so frustrated. With everything And almost everyone. The few people who’re supposed to be “my people” the ones who stay they’re here when I need them, aren’t. They’re rapped up in their own little worlds. Meanwhile I’m there... listening. Hearing. And trying to comfort them. All while silently falling into a dark, cold place. With nowhere to turn.

Person 1.) Mother; Has a ton of self-indulgent things happening that she brought on herself. Things that should have never started to begin with. So I’m sorry, I don’t feel the least bit bad for her situation anymore. She done, did, bring it on herself. And she knows it. I still listen and try to be there for her as much as I possibly can....

Person 2.) “Best friend” She’s always been a “let’s talk about, me, me, me!” Total, Toby Keith right there! But I’ve dealt with it. It’s annoying sometimes but we all need someone... But now that she’s pregnant, I’m not sure how much more I can take. She’s basically said that she wants to be the only girl in this family whose pregnant. Wants all the spot light on her. 😳🤯🤬😤 (Shes pregnant with my brother in laws 2nd child, her first.) She’s aware that we’ve been trying for almost a year to have another baby. So what in the actual fuck, is she thinking!? I’m not going to stop tryn get pregnant just cuz she is!!! That’s just.... fucking WOW!!!!!! She didn’t want to have a baby yet. She wasn’t ready yet. -These are words out of HER MOUTH NOT MINE!- But that’s what happens when you stop your birth control. You run the risk of pregnancy. 25yrs old and should know this. Damn. (She did. Just didn’t care) Anyway, to really top the cake of awesome things with her, her mother..... ugh. I seriously HATE THIS WOMAN!!!! She had the “balls” to tell “best friend” that she doesn’t want her child running around in saggy diapers like my kids do. 🤯🤯🤯🤯 who in the fuck says that!!!??? This woman has literally only met my children twice!!!!! 2 fucking times!? Who is she to judge my parenting skills!??!?? I just don’t understand. And do you think said “best friend” defense me!? Oh fuck no. She just agree and carry on. I mean come on. This mother of hers is officially on my fuck off, shit list. And her daughter is about to make that list too.

I’m so sick of people like that. I just can’t even hand the stupidity. Makes me want to cry and scream. And the shitty part is, I have nobody to talk to about this. NOBODY!!! I just want to wake up and no feel this emotional, empty feeling anymore... I’m so “tired”...

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