Lost Soul

~This Crazy Life Of Mine~
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2019-11-25 21:47:53 (UTC)

Hard to be happy

For the past almost year now, hubs and I have been trying to get pregnant. Well my brothers fiancé dropped a bomb a few months ago that they’re expecting. Awesome! I was excited about it and still am but was so taken back by it after it actually sunk in. I got over it and I’m extremely excited to meet my new niece! But today.... Today is something completely different.... Today my best friend (and almost sisters-in-law. She’s my brother-in-laws fiancé) dropped a bomb... She’s pregnant... At first I was shocked. Surprised. And slightly excited. But when it really sank in, was when she came up here and used one of my digital tests. (Reads “Pregnant” or “Not Pregnant”... It read Pregnant.

They’re not ready. They’re getting married next year and the only she was worried about is if her wedding dress is going to fit. Who in the fuck worries about!?! “Your” growing a life inside of ‘you’... I know I’m probably being a little dramatic about that but she had a scare once before this and said flat out she didn’t want a baby before they’re married. Which isn’t till September of next year.

When I seen them 2 lines of her original test I told her right out that them are my dream lines... and she said, “yeah, yours not mine!” Again, I know she’s in shock right now but nobody knows her as well as me.... she’s not ready... I on the other hand... I want them 2 lines... so my heart is weighing super heavy tonight.. I know I should be excited but it’s hard to feel that way for someone who doesn’t want to be pregnant to begin with... 😭

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