Blending my baskets in life
Placerville Apple Hill tour. That's where I went today with a bunch of peeps.
So I tried something. I have my multiple baskets in life. I keep them separate. My friend noticed I did this. Wasn't sure if it was the right thing to do. I did it because if one basket fails, I still have the others in life to keep me going. So I tried something. My meetup group, my dart friend, and my date. Yup, I had a date from my coffee and bagels dating site.
First let tell you about my baskets.
My friend Susan broke up with her dude and I felt bad for her. She is one of my dart friends and being in that basket (sorry I keep using that metaphor but it's my diary so it makes sense to me). She don't have many friends so I figure I'd get her to know my meetup friends. She can't go to our wine tasting events with my dart friends now if my friend (her ex) goes. Same as far as dinners at my place because all of them but for me favors him. To keep the peace, I still make arrangements to see them and Susan. That's why I took her today.
My meetup group scheduled an event today. My friend Heidi is the host. We had multiple tours at several Apple Hill farms in Placerville. Pretty cool place. Some have apple farms where you get a basket and pick your own apples. Other places of course sell anything and everything with apples. The apple cider beers are my favorite though but they have hot apple cider, apple dumplings, and apple whatever. We scheduled little itty bitty hikes from place to place. Final stop was to a brewery that had beer, wine, and mead.
Finally, my date. Ok, I've done some reading on dating again after a breakup. Gotta be careful I don't gauge my date on my ex or....what's even more dangerous is my perception of what my ex was because your mind will make it so that even if your ex came back, she may not even qualify anymore. This makes sense? lol. Still this date was......interesting. I tried to keep if fun with light humor and not discuss anything serious.
Well there was this booth that had running water in a channel with little sifters. You purchase a bag, pour it in your sifters, then run the sand out with the water that was flowing by. More for kiddos and it looked fun. When the sand comes out, you get these polished rocks that is left. Kids have fun and they get all these colorful rocks. I asked my date Jolie if she wanted to give it a try. You know, just cute little silly fun. She said no and it was because the big packet of sand was in a plastic bag. She is not into wasting or messing up the planet or something like that. I just smiled, kept going and asked her if she wanted to look at the little tents selling their trinkets and stuff.
We checked out the other tents. Some were selling little glass trinkets. I told her I recall watching them blow these glass trinkets back in Hawaii and its cool how they can make a piece of glass into art work. I said I'd burn my fingers for sure if I tried. Her response? " I don't like to buy things unless there is a use for it. If it don't have a function, then why keep it?" Oooooo k then.
Later, we checked out the last of the apple farms. We went to three of them altogether? She ate at each one. The final one she bought pickled cucumbers with pickled garlic. I was thinking no chance of kisses from me. But she ate an apple strudel at each farm.
Finally, the brewery. Jack Russel brewery. Yup, she ate again. Haha. We taste tested all different, wines, mead, and ciders. I actually liked the peach cider and bought a grog of it. My date Jolie brought up a crappy subject again. Indigenous people. Pretty much about them getting their land ripped off from the Gov't. I know of it. My ex gf was native american and coming from Hawaii, the Hawaiian people got ripped off too. I conversed with her about this but it's not a fun topic and not a topic to discuss on a first date. She also mentioned her other dates and discussed how they felt she should trust them blah blah blah. She was doing the same thing to me but I dodged the subject. I said that she could tell I was bothered when she didn't want to carpool with me. I told her life is too short and her opinion or fear of me is not my main concern.
We discussed our jobs a little. I get that she is doing her own business and may teach a class or two at Sac State. So that means she doesn't have a full time job. Then somehow she pops in with "Oh, did I miss not telling you I live with my Mom?" Haha. Oh my. Again, I don't judge and discussed a little about my job.
So I described what I do and the sensitive information that I possess since I'm in IT. I told her I actually have two DOJ background checks and have to have security clearance to get into some rooms. I have full access that even some other IT people do not have. My date replies with "Oh, I feel better now about you not being dangerous." I'm thinking really? You so worried about that shit? Then why are you on a dating app silly? I did have to comment and tell her that I mentioned that not to make her feel better about me, it's just my job and what I do. I asked if we could stop discussing her fears on dating strangers and it got a little lukewarm after that. She starts explaining that I don't understand how it is for a woman blah blah blah.
The night got later and I went to pee. My friend was near the exit when I walked back and said they and my date were leaving. So I said ok, and we left. But my meetup friends didn't leave. I misunderstood. Only my date was leaving. She didn't even give a cordial goodbye hug. So I guess that was that. I was glad it was over.
My friend had a good time. I had a good time with my meetup friends and some I haven't seen in years. They all said I changed and surprised how I look now. Hell yeah!! Losing 50 pounds and all the cool things that it does for you. Changed the way I dress. Changed my attitude. I like myself.
Now I remember reading that I shouldn't compare my date with my ex. My ex will be a gauge that may not be achievable because as time goes by, I may start to make her better than she actually was. But this lady? She had a floppy hat and shades on when we took pics. She didn't even like taking pics and asked that I don't post online. Get this... she said that it's an ewaste because computers will store that pic and it's not good for the earth. Holy moly!!! I asked if she could take a pic with me without her shades and floppy hat. She refused for some reason. So yeah...glad she is gone. No worries about she and I having any sexual confusion like I did with Faye. haha.
Again, I told my friend Susan on our ride home (she carpooled with me) that even if you don't feel like it, you should go. We may be happy maybe for a few minutes while there but it is part of self improvement. Maybe for a brief time, you'll forget about your problems. When you get home, you will be all alone again and somehow you know this when you are still out. But the chance of even having a 1% chance of a good time, you do it. Get out there and get busy in life. So we have a saying for this. I just tell her 1%. She did confess that it was hard for her to go out. She was strongly contemplating not going and she fought and went anyway. All because of what I told her. 1%. I'm glad I'm able to help her. She has her battles. I hope I helped her a little.
Didn't take too many pics. I didn't want my date to think I was attached to my phone and it's rude to do so but I squeaked a few out.
I'm home now. Kicking back on the sofa. I noticed that loony-roomy is back. Sigh... There goes my peace and quiet here. haha. Well, it was nice while it lasted. I feel my abs aching. I really did a number on it last night. Stretching my arms as I yawn, I feel my arms hurting too. lol. Quads feel ok though. It hurt a little but I thought it'd hurt a lot more considering the reps I did on the leg extension machine yesterday. My chest muscles (what little of them I have) hurts so I did it right last night.
Funny thing. I sort of hurt a little. Not in my body. Just a little in my heart. It's not even for anyone specific. I still can smile because I know it'll be alright. I think I feel this way because of some silly post I read on facebook. It said something regarding the tears at the corner of your eyes, the lump in your throat, the empty ache in your chest is the grief you feel but it's also love that just can't get out because it has no where to go. Now I'm not into those stupid inspiring posts but this one got to me a little I guess. Interesting day.
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