ish

ish
2019-10-28 04:22:59 (UTC)

proof is in the pudding.......the pudding is old

wow.....sometimes things just seem to take on a life of their own....and who am i to stop them...............

this will give me time to think i think for sure.......if the issue of trust wasnt such a big thing .......could be easy enough to ignore the lack of transparancy...............still just feel like an idiot.......is my own damn fault.........just kind of want to bury my head ...just forget..........

there is no purity in this world..it is tainted...........drenched with darkness....with revenge and remorse............
im glad to know i dont walk this way.....my karmic destiny....gives me clues....would be good for me to listen to them....they do speak loud..........

this has reinforced my understanding of how i process things through emotion....when i feel certain things..when i resist and make things difficult is cuse stuff is up...not all on the table...there is more that needs be known.........frustrated with people i thought i loved thinking im an idiot..........i have no desire to confront...none.........but understand why i might pull away now........feeling like an idiot making a fool of myself........its too bad you dont undersand my ability to know stuff....be lucky that im not vengefull or think the worst of you.........i give credit to your story that i am not privledged to know.........but im clear now so much better..not in some fantasy of dreams...but clear on reality......i forgive you.....is your karma damaged..i need do nothing..........you did say long time ago......that acting so guilty on something can really make one look suspecious......i recall how you needed to know all about me now.......i should have taken note i guess....just really hurt that is all the trust i have from you......i tell you my world and all in it........i get a rare hardly there pic from almost 2 yrs ago........enough to see that it is you with your wife and children in the other pictures.........beautiful family you are........i wish it well for what ever reason you dont want to share that with me............im at an end at what to say......debating if i will confront of ignore...or even bother coming back to talking to you...........im hurt you lack of faith in me...the lack of trust....you talk on trusting me......???? wow im truely blown away after going on 2 yrs...totally blown away............




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