from my heart
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2019-10-09 03:20:58 (UTC)

i hope youre out there somewhere doing okay

11:21 pm

there is a heart break i feel for a very very close friend. i have been very happy lately and i still am happy but i really miss my friend a lot. i miss jin so much. the only thing that makes me want to believe in a God is for the slight hope that maybe if i believe in a God, God will allow me to talk to jin just one more time.

the only thing i have left of him are screenshotted text messages, a playlist i made for him (which consists of every song he shared to me), his sound cloud songs, his youtube videos, and my memories. i miss him so much.

i wish i was famous or rich so there would be a way to find him. i miss him so much. id do anything to be able to talk to him just one more time. i really hope he is alive. i love jin with all my heart and soul and my heart breaks for him knowing he might be suffering and or even the possibility that he may be dead. i dont know if its selfish of me but most day i like to imagine that hes doing well because that way it doesnt hurt as much.

this is not a heartbreak over a boyfriend. its a heartbreak over a friend, a brother, someone who genuinely cared. if theres one thing in life that i feel blessed about is the fact that i got to cross paths with him. i dont want to keep thinking about him anymore because it hurts so badly.

i miss you jin and i love you so so much jin